Define happiness.  What makes us happy?  Is it subjective?  I think so.  But where does happiness really come from?  Does it come with who we really spend time with, or friends, families, lovers, or does it come from within?  I’ll never forget, someone was unhappy with their current lover at the time, about a year and a half ago, and I asked her, “Are you truly happy?  Because it comes from who you spend time with, who loves you, how people treat you, so are you truly ‘happy?’ “She told me that she disagreed, and she thought happiness came from within.  I can respect that.  So define happiness for me.  Not a bookshelf definition, just your thoughts on it.  I want replies, so if you’re reading this, do me a favor and tell me your thoughts.  And like I said, personal thoughts, not dictionary definitions.

Decisions based on emotion versus logic. Why does emotion always triumph? Emotions and logic are directly proportionate. When one goes up, the other goes down, and vice-versa. Why is this? Because the truth is, we don’t have the ability to think both ways at once. I’m the king of emotional thinking. I do things on the fly without thinking, and make impulsive decisions. Not only in big decisions, but small things too. I cannot fathom how I can sit here, and hate life one day, and absolutely love it the next. I hate that I have no control over it. I hate that I have made stupid decisions in my life, that I can look at now, and say, why the hell did I do that? What was I thinking? What is the deal with that? How can I be so logical now, but I was so illogical at the time? I just get the feeling that I don’t control my life sometimes, when I’m so caught up in emotions. Just like the first couple of sentences said, it’s emotion versus logic. 

I remember a phrase I thought up during Hurricane Katrina back in September, and I’ve never forgotten it. It was “Life is nothing but a series of events, fortunate or unfortunate.” I know it’s not much really but it meant a lot to me at the time. Katrina gave me a lot of time to ponder a lot of things, and I felt like when I got my life back and started, I was going to do a lot of things different. That wasn’t completely true though. Don’t get me wrong, I did for a while. I lived my life a lot better after that disaster, because I realized how much a lot in my life was worth. However, I easily slipped back into my previous state of taking everything for granted, and living the way I did. Don’t get me wrong when I say that, it wasn’t like I was a drug addict or anything like that, it’s just I thought I had things worked out, but I was wrong.Funny that I mention emotional ups and downs. As I was writing this blog, a dream that I had last night immediately came to mind. I remember I was somewhere like Florida or somewhere on a coast, and I was surfing. The waves were huge; I can’t put into words how large they were. But I remember I had major troubles staying on the surfboard. Upon writing this blog and remembering the dream, I looked up the meaning of surfing.

Surfing

To dream that you are surfing, indicates the ups and downs of some emotional situation or relationship. You may feel overwhelmed. One minute you can be in control of your emotions and the next minute you are not.

I would pretty much say that’s accurate.  Isn’t that strange how dreams can mean certain things or portray certain parts of our personality or feelings at a certain time?